It wouldn't be fair for me to only talk about the good on here and not the bad. What is life without both anyways? It seems that over the course of the last week and a half my body is getting used to my current dosage and life is returning to what it was. I am back to being afraid to answer the phone and have resorted back to text messaging only. I don't want to go anywhere unless it's work and would rather sit in my room searching for distraction. Old thoughts are resurfacing and I am beginning to doubt myself again. I am obsessing about my weight and getting rid of clothes that are too small on me and I think make me look big. I know I need to call my doctor and see if she can see me sooner, part of my doesn't care anymore and thinks that I will always be like this. I will give it a few more days to see if I am just in a slump. If things haven't improved by next Tuesday I will give her a call. I just wanted the people out there who read this to know.
It also doesn't help that last night's dream was so vivid, and in it I talked to everyone I needed to and explained everything and they supported and understood. When I woke up and realized nothing had changed and it was all just a silly little dream I wanted to cry.
