naked

apparently I need to add some nudity for some of you to respond,

A new begining

I have started to come to terms with how life is. Nothing is how I thought it was, nothing is even close to the way things are. I have begun to realize the world Is not what I thought it was. Now I realize that I have no choice but to join in.

I just didn't piece it together till today.

So today is my 4th day without my medication and I had to leave after 45 minutes because I was so emotional I was crying in the back room of our cafe for no reason. I knew something was wrong the last few days I have been dizzy and today woke up with really bad shakes. I felt like such an idiot, crying as I was leaving the store. I am now at home waiting for CVS to fill my prescription.

months have passed

So it's been a long while since my last post, things have been crazy with my work life spilling over into my home life. I have been so worried about the future that I can't focus on today. Now I am so stressed out about what tomorrow will bring I can't even think about today for a second. Things were ok when I was on my meds daily but since my phone has become useless I have to wait till tomorrow to try and call in my new prescription. I am twitchy and nervous and very paranoid, I can't get my thoughts straight, I bounce from here to there and back again. I Have been dizzy all day, and can't keep my hands still, my mind is racing at a thousand miles a minute and the topics I try to focus on change constantly. constantly constantly, I watched my landlords mother check her mail 4 times today and couldn't help but see one of my many possible futures.